Well, I know that I shouldn't be surprised, but somehow Father Sidney insisting on giving me a going away gift never crossed my mind as a possibility. Foolish, I know, but waht what can I say? He always did say only a fool could be as stubbornly diligent in thier their studies as I was. Still, I can't bring myself to be unappreciative of the new journal and writing set. And what better way to show my appreciation than to put his gift to use? So here I am, sitting in the back of a cart, writing in my new joru journal as my home town of Gulu disappears over the horizon. The road is a bit bumpy, but it's my stupid hands mixing up letters that's causing most of the mistakes thus far.

Anyway, I suppose I can go over why I'm leaving the only home I've ever known. My name is Trafalgor and I hail from the small town a day and a half's travel east of Mamlak named Gulu. Gulu doesn't have much going for it, but it certainly isn't so small so as to be called a village. Neither of my parents were natives of Gulu. In fact, I've never even met my father. According to my mother's stories when I was a boy, he died during a hunting accident before I was even born. However, the rumors around the town were not so kind in their description of my father. It matters not, honestly. I've never met the man, and I honestly don't care if I never do. In my 18 years of life, his absence has never had a significant impact.

My mother's death when I was 12, however… Well, that certainly had an impact. Even 6 years later, my heart aches from her absence. But I digress… Down that path lay melancholy and dis despair.

Anyway, after my mother passed, the local church took me under their care in honor of my mother's last request. Father Sidney took up responsibility for me and that, as they say, was that. He taught me how to read, write, and how to utilize magicks; "Life Skills" he called them while laughing. I never could tell when he was joking and when he was serious. He almost always had a smile on his face and he would laugh at almost any situation. No, I take that back. I could tell when he was really serious. I could just look into his eyes and tell when he wanted me to pay particular attention to whatever it was he was saying. Honestly, I would have preferred to learn how to do that over sitting at a desk by candlelight, copying old tomes for the church.

Regardless, I really do appreciate everything Father Sidney did for me. Even as I bid Gulu good bye, I don't regret the time I spent there under his care. However, Gulu is simply lacking the answers I require to my questions. I think that, more than anything else, I appreciate Father Sidney's manner of teaching me. He never gave me an answer as an absolute. He would always answer my questions with surety, but express it as what he believed was the correct answer. And if I had doubts, he would encourage me to take the time to research the matter on my own and decide if his answer was satisfactory afterwards. Most of the time, when this happened, I would be able to come back within the day with my answer. But there were times when my research took longer (one time, it even took me 2 months!). Even so, Father Sidney would patiently wait for my deliberation to complete… and no matter how many times his initial answer proved correct, he would never gloat or disparage how long it took me to find my own answer. Father Sidney would merely smile at me, give a nod, and say, "I'm glad you've found the answer that's satisfactory for you."

And that was that.

When I began to ask about the nature of the world, magick, and my faith… well, Father Sidney answered no differently than he usually did. He told me honestly what he believed about the nature of the world and the nature of magick… but my faith, he told me, was entirely up to me. He couldn't - no, he wouldn't tell me what to believe in. It was one of the few times he was entirely serious with me. He insisted that I search for my own answers to that particular question. He told me that he would happily give me any advice that he was able to, but that any specific answer he gave me would be entirely too biased for my own good. So I researched and studied.

6 months later and I still don't have the answer I'm looking for. When I told Father Sidney so, he just smiled at me, gave me a nod, and said, "Then the answer that's satisfactory for you simply can't be found here." 

So here I am, travelling in the back of a merchant's cart on my way to Mamlak. This isn't the first time I've been to the Great City, but this is the first time I'll be staying for longer than a day. My plan is to secure a room at an inn for a week as I search for answers to my question wherever I can around the city. I know not how successful I will be, but I have enough funds available to survive comfortably for a time before I need to obtain employment. The day's light is waning now, so I will stop here for now. 

~T~

I have spent 4 days in Mamlak, but I fear that the answers I seek cannot be found here. Were it a matter of biased readings or limited knowledge on the subject, I would be ecstatically booking further time at the inn and delving as deep as I could into the available material. However, I have discovered that I may have been rather spoiled back in Gulu with my having free access to the small library within the church. What few small collections of books I have been able to track down within the city so far have had access to them restricted from me. I didn't think to ask Father Sidney for anything like a letter of introduction when I left. So, unfortunately, as mzungu - or an outsider (rough translation) - I am unlikely to convince anyone here in the city to let me study their books freely. I'm certain that were I to continue looking around, I might luck into a situation that would allow me access to such a trove of knowledge. That being said, my instincts are telling me that I may have better luck looking elsewhere.

Growing up in Gulu, I occasionally helped bring in food by hunting once I was of an age to do so. Over the years, I learned to rely on and trust my instincts fervently. The few times (early, early on) that I didn't trust them almost ended up getting myself or one of my hunting mates killed. So when my instincts started to tell me that trying to convince the short priest was a waste of time, I followed that instinct and simply bid the man farewell. I worried for a moment that my frustration with my lack of progress was being mistaken for my instinct, but when the gut-clenching feeling disappeared as I walked down the road, I realized the feeling was true. After a quick stop at a fruit stand, I decided to wander aimlessly around the markets to clear my head. One thing led to another and at some point I ended up back at the inn I was staying at. I opted to grab a seat in the tavern, order myself a drink, and calm my thoughts as the day drew to a close. 

As night fell, I couldn't help but overhear a man with the looks and accent of an Ataiyo native going on about how different the customs of the city were from his home. Now, I'm not normally nosy by my nature, but I felt compelled to speak further with the man. So I did… and I was not disappointed with my decision!

The man, Sato, happily (if a bit drunkenly) told me all about his home in Nisshoki. How that, even though people there tended to be more reserved, their outlook about the world in general was varied and that most people were willing to discuss their views (in moderation). The more I heard about the city, the more I knew I had to travel there to see it for myself. I thanked the man by way of paying for his next round of drink before heading back out into the city to secure myself passage eastward to Nisshoki. After arranging airship fare two days hence, I returned to the inn and have now settled in for the night.

Tomorrow I will send Father Sidney a letter to update him on the progress of my search and my current plans. I know that I will not be here to recie receive his reply, so I will tell him to delay his return letter until I can write him again from Parvpora after securing myself lodging. I almost made it through this entry without an error, but it seems the late hour has frazzled the connection between my mind and hand. That being the case, I will end this here.

~T~ 

Note to self: air ships are not an enjoyable experience for the first few hours. That being said, once the nausea goes away, the view from up there is splendid! And while I didn't enjoy most of the crew laughing at my misfortune, I can admit in retrospect that the situation was rather humorous. 

But enough about that! I have arrived safely in Nisshoki and already gotten myself settled in a local inn. Once again, I have secured my room for a week, but already I feel like I'll be extending my stay. The owner of the inn and his family have all been very accommodating of my questions. It has been an entirely more enjoyable experience than my time in Mamlak and it has been less than a day! My instincts are saying that I've come to the right place to continue my hunt. 

It certainly doesn't hurt that the city of Nisshoki is vastly more beautiful to my aesthetics than Mamlak was. Fortune might trule truly be in my favor. I managed to arrive during one of the larger festivals or celebrations here in the city - the blooming of the cherry blossom trees. The city covered in the small pink and white petals is truly a sight to behold. Seeing the couples and families (and even large groups!) sitting around the public spaces and just watching the petals fall makes me want to join in. Perhaps I'll visit one of the street vendors to purchase… I think they were called 'obento'? I need to learn the local dialect here… and quickly. But yes, I think I'll purchase one of those obento and go join in on the hanami. 

I feel like the entire Ataiyo culture encompasses the kind of spirituality that calls out to me in a way that the ones back in Canelux never did. According to the owner of the inn, the entire cherry blossom viewing festival is a celebration of the beginning of Terra. Specifically, it seems to be a celebration of life in general with the focus on cherry blossoms emphasis emphasizing their short life spans. Apparently, it is supposed to be an analogy for the relative shortness of human life… to remind us of our vulnerability and encourage us to make the most of our short lives.

If this is the sort of thing I can expect to be the norm here in Ataiyo, then I truly believe that I have found the best place to find the answers I'm searching for. I think that will do for now. So I will end there here and go search for a good place to watch the cherry blossom petals.

~T~

Good gracious! It's been over a month since I last even picked up this journal! I told myself that I would update it at least once a week and keep notes of my progress… but then so much happened! Okay, before I get ahead of myself, let me bring things back and try to explain better.

So, much as I found in Mamlak, the libraries are guarded fiercely by their caretakers. Being an outsider, or 'gaijin' as they call mzungu here, has done me few favors during my time here. Even so, I have found the population as a whole have little issue answering my questions so long as I do so respectfully and don't intrude overmuch into their daily activities. The shrine priests and maidens, in particular, are almost always available to sate my curiosity (for a small monetary offering to the shrine). While my height and skin tone mark me as an obvious outsider, I have been picking up the local dialect quickly, which seems to have endeared me to a great number of the people I interact with on a daily or weekly basis. I now know for certain that Ataiyo is where I need to be to continue my research.

During my studies, I have come to the initial conclusion that the world works and flows in cycles in an attempt to balance itself out. As such, I have decided to emulate that by changing my lifestyle to suit. I have been focusing on gaining knowledge and finding where my spirituality lay. In doing so, I have been neglecting both my physical and magickal well being. To properly remedy this state of affairs, I began to ask around for information on the local martial arts. After much whispered discussion from various sources, I decided initially that neither of the most well known school of martial prowess suited me. While the code of honor the Horitshi follow interests me greatly, I have absolutely no interest in using swords. By that same mindset, learning to become shadoka held no sway with me whatsoever. I can and have killed before, but the thought of doing so as a matter of course during the completion of my career choice is anathema to me.

I had nearly given up hope on finding a teacher and resigning myself to self-study and exercise… but decided to ask the one person that initial helped me to decide that Nisshiko would be an ideal location to settle down to learn. Old Man Yamada, the owner of the inn I am staying at, simply looked me over very slowly one time and asked me one simple question while looking directly into my eyes: "For what reason do you fight?" 

His question caught me off guard, but I did not need long to think of an answer for him, as I had long ago asked myself that same question. I replied to him, "I fight for my family, my friends, and to protect the lives of the innocent." Those were the only things I knew I could raise my staff, my bow, and my knife with the intent to draw blood or take a life for with a clear conscious.

He merely nodded at me, apparently approving of my answer, and motioned for me to follow him as he walked towards the back of the inn, where he and his family lived in a separate building. He led me to a room on the lowest floor… that was a large open space with a small shrine set along one wall that was bracketed by a pair of hanging scroll paintings. At first I was confused, but I quickly followed the innkeeper's example and bowed to the shrine as I entered. I came to find out after we had taken a seat on the tatami floor that the room was called a dojang or dojo and that he was the teacher of a school of martial arts known as Te that held its origins back before Nisshoki was founded. Over the years, many political and cultural changes forced the many schools of Te to quietly go into hiding.

Without going too deep into the inner workings of the schools, I'll simply say that Yamada-sensei agreed to teach me alongside his daughter (who has been learning Te since she was a young girl) in exchange for my assistance with various things around the inn. I, of course, quickly agreed… which led to my lengthy delay updating my journal. I have been so utterly exhausted at the end of my days from my physical and magickal practice that simply bathing before crawling into my futon is a chore in and of itself.

Speaking of my magickal training, I have been learning the elemental manipulations of the Druids when I have spare time and energy. Thus far, I have only learned how to manipulate the air with my magick, but it is still progress from the few spells taught to me by Father Sidney in order to protect myself from the undead and heal or cure the injured. As he would tell me as a boy, "some progress is better than no progress." For now, I am seriously in need of a bath. I'll update again when I'm able, but I'm not sure I'll be able to fit everything I'm learning into a single journal. I may need to acquire extra in advance… food for later thought.

~T~

Two weeks to update this time. Better than before, but still not the once per week I was intending to do. I guess it can't be helped… Speaking of which, the people of Ataiyo have a very impressive cultural history. I know that seems completely off-topic at first glance, but I am seriously impressed with how much history and meaning I keep finding in the everyday actions and mindsets of the people I regularly associate with. Yamada-sensei's daughter, Yukino, has been helping me learn the local dialect on top of helping her father in teaching me the Te kata her family protects. Oh, yes! That's another concept that's completely different from anywhere else I've ever been!

Back in Gulu and Mamlak, the only people that were considered 'senior' to you in status were those that were older than you, those in positions of power like religious leaders and tribe elders, and those from nobility. While all of those are true here as well, the Ataiyo people also recognize an ideal called 'senpai'. A senpai is anyone that has been in a position longer than you have or that has more experience than you at something. Accordingly, I have been calling Yukino-senpai with her proper honorific whenever we are in the dojo. It was a bit difficult for me to wrap my head around the concept initially, but Yukino truly is a good senpai. She makes sure to do her best at tutoring me in whatever I'm trying to learn, even though she's 2 years younger than I am.

It was strange showing such deference to someone younger than myself, but I believe that oddity came from the cultural norms of my home more than anything else. I know for certain that my mother made sure to beat any ill thoughts about women having greater status than myself out of me at a young age. So that definitely wasn't a factor! All I know is that I have been surprised at the accelerated pace I have been learning at these past 2 weeks and that the experience has been extremely satisfying to me. 

Now that I have finally gotten used to the physical training, I have been able to spend more time focusing on my magickal training. Neither Sensei nor Yukino are very skilled with magick, so I have been having to study and teach myself through trial and error. I have found that the key for me to utilize my magick easiest was a mild form of self-hypnosis. As long as I believe myself capable of performing the magick, then I am able to do so. It certainly seems to be counter-productive and illogical, but it works for me. The most difficult part of the process was finding an appropriate place to practice that wouldn't bother the people around me. I have recently strengthened the amount of power behind my air manipulation as much as I'm comfortable within the city walls. I feel like I still have room to grow in power, but I fear that if I take it any further at this point in time that I may cause unwanted damage to the people and properties around me… especially in the event I lose control.

So I am left with the choice to either focus on increasing my control of air manipulation or attempt to learn a different elemental manipulation. If I choose the former option, I think the best way would be to maintain a moderate amount of power while decreasing the amount of air being manipulated. The also might hold true, as well… trying to maintain control of a larger amount of air while keeping the amount of power steady would probably work, too… The initial logic seems sound, but I would be wise not to assume that the magick or air will act as initially expected.

Another of Father Sidney's excellent adages: "Wise is the man that expects the unexpected to happen. Wiser is the man that plans for that inevitability."

The latter option… if I had to choose a new element to attempt to control, I think that water would be both the safest and easiest to attempt. I would need to find a source of water to practice near on a regular basis. I somehow think that Sensei would frown fiercely at me were I to practice in the bath.

I think the least dangerous option at present time would be to attempt controlling a new element. I'll ask Sensei and Yukino if they know anywhere I could practice manipulating water without disturbing anyone… and isn't the docks. While I may have gotten used to the standard cuisine of Ataiyo, the docks smell entirely too strongly of fish for me to concentrate properly while just beginning to learn. Perhaps after I practice for a while and feel more confident, I can use the docks as a test of my concentration and control without fear of losing control and possibly harming someone. 

~T~

Studies with Sensei have been going apace now that my body is used to the punishment of training. While kata training is no more difficult that it was previously, Sensei has begun to incorporate more and more body strengthening exercises. He has not presented them as such to me, but the meaning and intent behind the exercises were not difficult to discern. In fact, were it not for Father Sidney constantly insisting that I use my mind as much as possible growing up, I believe I would have already lost my patience with Sensei's teaching methods. By 'teaching methods,' I mean that he tells me to do something and I do it without any further explanation from him. Such was rather irksome for me at the beginning of my training, but I now realize that his method of teaching is itself its own form of test for me.

Having been living here for several months now, and having known Sensei for just as long, I now realize that he is teaching me in this manner while fully expecting me to lash out in anger and frustration at his methods. He knows me well enough to know exactly how inquisitive I am and that for me to unquestioningly follow instructions is very much not to my taste. Having realized that fact, I have been reigning in my emotions and thinking thoroughly through every instruction he gives me even as I am following them immediately after he gives them. By doing so, I have been able to notice my clear advancements from when I began, which led me to the conclusion that he did, in fact, have a reason for his seemingly illogical instructions. I simply was not privy to those reasons, nor was he liable to reveal them to me presently.

This has forced me to pay even closer attention to myself and the exercises he has been having me perform. Much of it seems like simple weight training, helping me increase the strength of my many muscles. However, the tools I am forced to use are… unusual, to say the least. For instance, for one of my very first exercises that was not kata practice, Sensei had me fill four large clay pots using rocks from the streets around the city. However, they were all to be no larger around than the nail of my thumb. The task took me two weeks to complete and I came back to my room every day tired beyond belief. Once I had completed that task, those four pots became my new training tools. The next exercise had me carrying the pots two at a time from one end of the dojo by gripping the lip of the pots with my hands, dropping the pair off, then doing the same with the other two. Once they had been brought all to one side, I would have to take them all back over to the starting position. I had to repeat that entire process ten times before I could move on to kata practice for the day.

Sensei also has me striking a board of wood wrapped in rope on a daily basis. There are two such boards set up in the dojo, one at chest height and one at ankle height. I must perform one hundred strikes with each hand and foot before I am allowed to move on to the aforementioned strength training and kata practice. What frightens me more than anything else about the intensity of training I have been forced to go through thus far… is that I am perfectly aware that I am still considered a novice and that this is just the beginning of the training regimen. I fear that in a few months' time I will look back upon this journal entry, remember the current amount of effort and pain I am being put through, and laugh at my past self while thinking fond thoughts of these simpler times.

Yukino just read that last line over my shoulder and instantly started giggling unreservedly while walking away. While my immediate thought is that I should probably stop writing in my journal when I'm not in my room, I can't help but take her actions as more reason to reaffirm my previously mentioned fears. Enough about that though!

While practicing with my magick, something… unusual occurred that I'm not entirely sure how to explain. Therefore, I shall write down my observations and attempt to draw conclusions afterwards.

I have recently mastered manipulating water to the same level I had reached with air previously. That in and of itself, while impressive with how quickly I was able to do so, was not what was unusual. I decided to focus on controlling my air manipulation to a finer degree and ended up experimenting a bit. I attempted to keep a small sphere of air completely still and unaffected by the winds constantly blowing near the docks. I had expected it to be difficult, but I had more trouble than I had initially assumed.

Separating the sphere of air was no more difficult that usual, but keeping it unaffected by the surrounding winds while keeping the air within the sphere still proved to be mentally and magickally taxing. However, I did manage to perform the feat for a few seconds! But this is where the oddity occurred… When I released my control of the air, several small crystals of ice and frost fell into my lap. The cold surprised me, but more than anything I could not understand where the crystals had come from! Of course, the ice quickly melted in the heat of the day, but I was instantly curious as to how the ice was even able to form in the heat in the first place. I have not yet tried to learn how to control ice or to turn water under my control into ice. I knew that theoretically I would be able to magically will water to be cold enough to turn into ice once I applied myself to the task, but I had been focusing all of willpower into keeping the air under my control completely still - not making water cold enough to freeze!

Thinking that my proximity to the lake may have been a factor or that my control of water may be at fault, I returned to the inn for the day and, with Sensei's permission, tried the same thing in the dojo. Without the winds fighting my control, the attempt was much easier to handle. Once I felt that I had successfully stopped the air's movement within the sphere, I slowly opened my eyes while maintaining my control. To my amazement, I could actually see the sphere of air due to the layer of frost slowly expanding around it. I quickly let go of my control, which caused the sphere to collapse and once again dump the quickly melting crystals and frost into my lap.

This time I was certain; I was completely focused on my air manipulation and not on my water manipulation. So where did the water come from and how did it get turned into ice?

After some thought, I have come to only a single conclusion that makes any sort of sense, but it will need much testing to try and verify. Somehow, though I do not understand how, there must be a minuscule amount of water within the very air around us, even though there was no water source in the immediate vicinity (nor was it raining). This is the only explanation as to where the water I was able to turn into frost came from that fits the current information I have. However, that begs the question of how the water turned to frost just from me stopping the air from moving? There is an obvious connection between the two events, but I do not yet understand what that connection is.

I will need to ponder further on this at a later time.

~T~

TRULY I am a fool!

The answer was right there in front of me the whole time! I was just too much a fool to understand it! It came to me while watching Yukino make soup for supper this evening. I was pondering the ramifications of there being water in the air that could be frozen merely by stopping all movement of the air around it when the steam rising from pot where Yukino was cooking. I believe I surprised us both when I dashed over and placed my hand over the pot to feel the steam. While it was mildly painful, I feel that the pain was well worth the knowledge my actions produced. For when I checked my hand upon bringing it away from the steam, I found my hand to be covered in beads of water!

From the act of simply heating up water, it caused small amounts of water to rise up on the hot air above it! And the bubbles within the soup! I couldn't believe that I didn't realize until just then that just like there were small amounts of water in the air, that there could also be small amounts of air in water! That is something I will have to test out at a later time, but it is still an amazing bit of information! What's more, I should have realized all of this much sooner! Surely, if I knew that water turns into ice when it gets colder outside, why wouldn't I realize that water would move faster in the heat?! And when water turns into ice, it becomes unable to move; it literally becomes frozen!

That would mean that when it gets cold outside during the months of Glaciem, the air is moving slower! Whether it becomes colder because the air is moving less or the air moves less because it is cold, I do not yet know, but there is a direct connection between the two. 

Wait a moment… if heat makes water rise into the air… does that mean that the storms that come ashore… the clouds… is that all just large amounts of water floating in the air? That would mean that rain… rain is nothing more than the water that rose into the air when it was hot finally cooling down enough to fall back down! And I know from my days growing up on the Mamlak peninsula that all of that rain water flows back to the rivers… and that the rivers flow to the oceans. By the gods… it's a cycle!

Both Yukino and Sensei are looking at me worriedly now. Perhaps my laughter sounded a bit too hysterical? I really should stop writing in my journal when I'm not in my room, but I fear that if I do not write down my thoughts immediately, I may forget something important later when attempting to put my thoughts to parchment. 

And now Yukino is tutting at me and insisting I eat supper. I shall ponder further on the things I've realized today and experiment further when next I have the opportunity.

~T~

After further consideration and going over previous entries, I have determined that the conditions of 'being hot' or 'being cold' is caused by how fast the air is moving and not the other way around. I say this because it was I that caused the state of the air within my sphere of influence to 'completely stopped', after which the water within the air froze due to how cold the air was. Since everyone knows that the sun causes the day to become warmer, does that mean that light causes warmth? Again, the initial theory seems sound, but I am not sure I can test it sufficiently at this time. I need to write to Father Sidney and request advice on how to manipulate light the way I have learned to do with air and water. He previously only taught me the spell Sun Strike… which, I'll admit, I could study and disassemble without too much difficulty. However, I have not been writing to Father Sidney as often in recent days compared to the beginning of my quest. I'm sure he would appreciate the opportunity to impart knowledge and advice to his most determined pupil once again.

Besides, I have plenty of things to mull over at present time anyway. I have performed two additional tests with my elemental manipulations since my previous entry and have come up with curious results.

The first test I performed was an attempt to separate the small amounts of water in the air from the air itself. Because I expected to end up with a small amount of water as a result of my test, I decided to perform them at the docks. I chose a side where no ships were currently docked so that I wouldn't be in the way or bother any of the crews or dock workers with my presence. Being closer to the water, I also expected there to be more water in the air than there would be further into the city, thus giving me better results.

I began by extending my control as much as possible to gather as much air as I could, which ended up being only large enough for me to have fit inside of the sphere if I were sitting down as I was at the time. After I had control of the air, I focused my water manipulation into the sphere and concentrated on pulling every speck of water within to one side of the sphere. In a very short amount of time, a globe of water began to form and increase in size near my left hand. Once my manipulation could pull no further moisture from within the sphere, I released my control over the air and was left with a wobbling sphere of water about the size of my head floating above my left hand. I deemed my test a success, even though I was certain that my control over the sphere of air had weakened a number of times, allowing more air to enter while I was pulling away water. It was a success because I was able to confirm that there was small amounts of water within the air and that I could separate the two elements with my magick.

That just left my last test… and since I already had water at-hand, there was no time like the present. My next test was the opposite of the previous test: I was going to attempt to pull air from the water in my hands. My theory was that because air bubbles formed and released from water when it was heated, there must be small amounts of air within water. So my test was going to see if this was true… and if I could actually separate them with my magick.

I began by forming another small sphere of air around the water… then began to pull against the water with my air manipulation. It was difficult… very difficult… but it worked. I was forced to close my eyes to concentrate to get it to work initially, but once my magick began pulling the air away from the water, it became much simpler to continue the process. However, when I opened my eyes to watch the process, I almost lost control of the entire thing due to my surprise.

Within the sphere were now three substances: the noticeably smaller sphere of water, the clear air that I was pulling away from the water, and a white smoke… or mist. I don't know what it was, but its presence startled me because of how unexpected it was. And once I had returned my attention back to the sphere of air I was controlling as a whole, I also noticed the increased heat emanating from it. Why, I did not know. I wasn't intentionally moving the air around as quickly as I could to cause it to heat up, but for some reason just by separating the air from the water was causing everything to heat up. Was it the white mist? Or was it being caused by the act of separating itself? Regardless, I continued pulling the air, curiosity winning out against the small voice of caution in the back of my mind.

As I watched, I could see the water dwindling away as the space taken up by both the white mist and clear air got larger… and once the water completely disappeared, all that was left was the mist and air. The mist took up the majority of the small sphere while the clear air was focused near my right hand. Tentatively, I released control of the small pool of air within the sphere and watched as the mist quickly swirled in and mixed with it, leaving the entire sphere as a smokey rotation.

And then the sun came out from behind the clouds that I had not noticed until just then.

At first nothing happened… but after a few seconds and without any warning, the sphere exploded in a fiery blast with a loud 'boom' right in my face. That was the last thing I could remember before I was being shaken awake by one of the dock hands who had come to investigate where the loud explosion had originated from.

At first, I couldn't hear the man at all. It was very disconcerting to see someone moving their lips in speech, but not hear anything aside from a piercing ring. It was at this point that I began to take stock of myself and realized that my hands and face were burned and that the explosion had damaged my ears. There was also an odd smell in the air, but I ignored it in favor of my injuries. I quickly motioned for the man to stop trying to talk and gestured to indicate that I couldn't hear him. Once he seemed to understand, I focused my magick inward and began to heal myself like Father Sidney had taught me to. Slowly, but surely, I could feel the burns on my body and the ringing in my ears disappear. Once everything seemed normal again, I explained to the dock hand that I had been testing the extent of my magick and one of my tests had unforeseen complications.

After verifying that I was okay one last time, he went to report to his supervisor what had happened and I made my way back to the inn. When I returned, both Sensei and Yukino immediately burst into laughter at the sight of me, much to my confusion. It took Yukino dragging me to the door of her room and bringing out her small metal mirror to show me my face for me to understand their amusement. When the explosion burned me, I didn't think about what else it might have burned away.

Namely, the hair above my forehead, my eyebrows and patches of my mustache and beard, which I had just started to attempt to grow out the previous month. While my Heal spell took care of my wounds, it apparently didn't do anything to restore hair to its previous state. Well, I suppose it can't be helped…

After explaining to Sensei and Yukino what had happened, Sensei laughed even harder at me before banning me from practicing my magick within the dojo any longer. While annoying, I couldn't fault him in the least for his precaution. If something as seemingly harmless as air and water (not as a large storm, either) could cause this much damage just by manipulating it a certain way, what would the obviously dangerous elements like fire and lightning do? That being said, I have vowed not to repeat that particular test until I have a better understanding of the forces at play or have someone that does present to act as a safety net for my foolish curiosity.

~T~

Apparently having enough energy and time on my hands to hurt myself testing out the limits of my magick means that I'm not being challenged enough by Sensei's instruction. So Sensei has decided to increase the frequency and difficulty of our sessions.

I had just started to get used to the routine of steadily lugging the rock-filled pots back and forth across the dojo, but now Sensei has me doing it by slowly lunging one step at a time while still not allowing the pots to touch the tatami until I reached the other side. On top of that, during kata training, Sensei has begun putting me through what he calls 'Iron Shirt' training. What, you may ask, is 'Iron Shirt' training? I'll tell you what it is…

It is PAIN and AGONY.

This is a poor explanation, I know, but the heart of the matter is exactly that. At this point, Sensei has not offered any sort of explanation as to what, exactly, this 'Iron Shirt' training is supposed to do… and I am in entirely too much pain to think of any reasonable explanations. The training consists of Sensei taking a hard wooden practice sword, or a bokken in the local vernacular, and beat me all over my body with it as I slowly go through my kata. If I flinch away from the bokken or make an error in the kata, I am forced to start the entire exercise over again from the beginning.

Some of the places he strikes me make sense, such as striking my arms and wrists at the exact moment in the kata where I would reasonably expect to have made contact with something in an actual physical engagement. But some of the places he strikes me make no sense to me! What good does hitting me in the calf do? Or my inner thigh? Or, even worse, on my shoulders near my neck or in my ribs under my arms? I am doing my best to not think ill of my teacher, but I can't help but feel that Sensei is taking more than a little bit of satisfaction in beating me black and blue. 

I don't think it's the case, but it could be related to how Yukino and I have been becoming better friends over the past few weeks. As far as I can tell, neither of us have any sort of romantic feelings for the other, but we have definitely been becoming closer to each other. Perhaps a mild protective streak?

Regardless, the training has increased to almost devilish levels and my patience is running thinner by the day. Speaking of which, I am now absolutely certain that my Sensei is trying to shatter my patience and make me lash out at him. I have absolutely no idea WHY he is trying to do so, but he has been quite obvious in his prodding at my known irritants. Yukino, sweet as she may be, has not helped any at all, either. If anything, her knowing smirks and giggling have only irritated me further… and her complete refusal to explain why her father is intentionally testing my patience has me at my wit's end.

Ugh… Yes, I wrote out 'Ugh'… I feel like it really needed to be put to parchment to emphasize my complete lack of energy at this point in time. Enough thinking for one night… I am going to go take a bath, Heal my bruises, crawl into my futon, and turn off my brain for the night. Perhaps tomorrow will grant me additional insight or patience… or both? One can hope…

~T~

I have been patient. I have been, I feel, very understanding of the fact that Sensei has been teaching me in a manner that, frankly, outright frustrates me because he is the master and I am the student and he is deserving of respect regardless of my personal feelings. But enough is enough. At this point, my lessons are bordering the sadistic and still Sensei has explained nothing of the purpose for the additional training measures. Yukino's knowing smirks and giggling has stopped being funny or cute. I am done with waiting. I will confront Sensei during today's lesson and either get the answers to my questions from him… or no longer be a student.

~T~