Forcing herself to walk away from him was the hardest thing she had ever done. When she left, she found herself back in Sularia. There, she curled up with several of her animal friends and cried for hours as they were silently comforting her. Akira cried from the pain until she had no more tears to shed. Emotionally, she was spent, her body more like an empty shell of someone who once was.

Her head was drooped low, her shoulders slumped as the foxling got up and headed into the house. She went through the motions of coming home. A kiss was given to each twin, a hug given to each mother (without the usual enthusiasm), and a scritch behind the ear of Kyu and Reika. Akira took the customary bath to cleanse herself of the road's dirt, but she lingered far longer than normal. Slowly, she made her way upstairs where she closed the door to her room and sat on the bed.

For days, the teenaged fox remained silent. She did not smile, nor did she leave her room unless absolutely mandatory. Looking upon her, one could clearly see that it was as if the color, the reason behind her happiness vanished. Something was wrong, and she closed everyone out.

When her mother came in to talk, the woman would find Akira's room disturbingly untouched. No laundry was strewn about, books were neat and tidy. All toys were where they belonged. Even her bed looked undisturbed, though she lay on it with her back to the door. "Not hungry," Akira whispered for what seemed like the thousandth time.

Something was wrong with her daughter, and Larka knew that from almost the instant Akira walked through the door a few days before. From her lack of enthusiasm with her hugs, to the longer than normal bath, to staying in her bedroom for hours, only coming out when she had to. Larka had not immediately went to see what was wrong, knowing that Akira would, hopefully, come to her or Celeste in time, when she was ready.

But a mother’s patience was only going to last so long when one of their children was upset and so now it was time for Larka to mother a little harder. She had given enough time, she felt, for Akira to talk to them, and the rejection of food had been more concerning when that had started. So when Larka tapped on the door gently and then went into Akira’s room she didn’t have anything in her hand but a glass of water. When Akira spoke Larka replied, speaking calmly as she noted the cleanliness of Akira’s room, unusual for her. ”I only brought you something to drink.” She set the glass down and looked to Akira.

Larka sat on her daughter’s left side, or in such a way that her right arm was towards Akira. ”I want you to talk to me, Akira, but I’m not going to force you to, ok?” Larka started. ”But, please, talk to me, or Celeste, tell us what’s wrong and we can work as a family to help you.” She reached out to gently brush Akira’s cheek with a small smile. ”Still love you bunches and bunches.”

Larka had not come with food like she had assumed. Instead, her mother brought a glass of water and brought it over to her bedside table. Then she sat at the edge of the bed, all but pleading with the foxling to open up about what was troubling her. As Larka's hand brushed her cheek, Akira's lips perked up into a fleeting smile. As soon as it had appeared, the expression was gone, melting back into static melancholy.

"Do you remember when Celeste died?" Akira started with a voice just above a whisper as if sound would destroy her completely. "The pain and fear of never seeing her again?" her voice trailed off. Still, she lay with her back toward the door, without moving. "It's like that… Except… There is no death."

Oh how she wished there was. It would make accepting the whole thing a lot easier. But they were both very much alive. "No one can help… Lady Angela can't intervene. You can't bring back that which is not dead…" Akira rolled over onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. "I don't think I'd be well received if I were to request her influence in the matter either…"

Finally, her amber gaze drifted to Larka. Pain was very evident now across her whole face. Even to an untrained eye, this was a familiar pain of the heart, a pain that is so harsh and swift, a pain never easily overcome. "Promises were broken… Backs are turned…. And it hurts so much…" Her face scrunched up as she sat up. "Why does it hurt so, Mommy?" Akira wailed as she threw herself against Larka, burying her face in her mother's shoulder. "Why does it hurt to be pushed away? Forgotten?" She sobbed as she held onto Larka for support, her anchor in the storm of emotions rising to engulf her once more.

When Akira started to speak her words made Larka nervous, what had happened to her to compare it to when Larka thought she had lost her wife AND her daughter at the same time? Again?! But there was no death, which in and of itself was at least partly good news in this instance. Larka didn’t interrupt as Akira continued, those pained amber eyes had Larka’s own watering in seeing the pain her daughter was going through.

But as Akira continued Larka was putting together an idea of what had happened. She sat up before throwing herself against Larka, who wrapped her arm tightly around Akira and held her close and tight. Larka was silent for a bit, allowing Akira to cry for a time, and it seemed it was a much-needed cry to. But Larka did speak after a few minutes and pulled Akira tight as she started. ”It hurts because you cared, it hurts because you loved, it’s hurts because broken promises hurt.” Larka started. ”You are a loving girl, my sweet, so it hurts you a little more, because you love your friends so much.” Larka used her thumb to clear some tears from Akira’s cheeks before hugging her again. ”This may not be of comfort, my sweet, but its’s the truth; everyone has felt this way before in their life, myself included.” Story time! Akira didn’t need to say much more and Larka had guessed at what had happened already. Boy problems, though for Larka’s part it would have been a bit easier of this was all girl problems.

”Back when I was, oh, twenty-six, ish, around that, I met a young lady that I had a fancy for.” Larka had thought to tell Akira of Lilith, Larka’s first wife, and the twins that they had adopted and the loss of them, but decided to leave that for another time. ”We dated for a few months, almost a year, I was smitten with her, I was ready to marry her. But, then one evening I came back to our shared hotel room to find her in bed with another woman, and a man. I had caught her off guard because I was home early from a job I had taken, she hadn’t expected me until the next night. I even had flowers and candy for us to share that night, I wanted to surprise her by being home early.” Larka sighed, it had been some time since she had thought about this. ”She wanted me to stay, but I still felt betrayed. She could have waited one more night for me to come home, she knew what I thought of being with a man, yet she betrayed me, and it hurt.”

”After that, well, for more than a week I don’t think an hour passed that I wasn’t drunk. I had drinking problems before that, and that situation didn’t help, only pushed me further into the bottle. This was well before I met your mommy and she helped me through that time of my life, how I managed to live until then I don’t know. Will power?” She shrugged. ”The point is, is that it hurt, a lot, and for a long time to. I drowned my pain in booze,” And more random sex, but that was NOT something Larka was about to tell Akira about. ”but that only numbs the pain, it doesn’t stop it. So, eventually I had to make a choice; pick myself up and move on with my life, or, keep drinking myself stupid until it killed me. Honestly I almost chose to keep drinking, but I’m too stubborn to let that happen to myself.” She chuckled. ”And you are too smart to let this get you down for very long, I promise you that, my sweet. I picked myself up and moved on, I took jobs when I could, avoided her as much as I could for a few months until the pain in my heart had faded. It wasn’t gone, but it was easier to deal with. I ran into her again by chance a couple of months later, she was pregnant, and she was happy. And, somehow, seeing her happy, despite how she had hurt me, made me happy for her. She wasn’t a bad person, she made a mistake, and she did apologise to me for what she had done. She moved on and so did I, both of us happy and we remained friends until we lost contact with each other when I moved.”

She smiled and kissed Akira’s forehead. ”So you take the time you need, Akira, and cry as much you need, on my shoulder or your mom’s, we’re here for you. Stay home for a little while, it’ll be good to have you home and I’m sure the twins would be thrilled to have their big sister around to play with.” Larka smiled. ”But, most importantly, if you need anything please tell us and we’ll help you in anyway we can.” Larka squeezed Akira close to her again as she finished speaking.

Larka just hoped that her words would at least help in some way.