Author: Xunatar, Posted: Tue Nov 14, 2017 1:23 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

The god suppose that given time and her smarts, Caitlin would be able to rise through her small town mindset and see the bigger, broader picture. What good was freedom is she was still internally shackled? No, she would rise or she would fall- it was as simple as that in his eyes. The demon looked to where, his face emotionless but his eyes were intrigued when she was well aware of what sort of tribute she would have to pay for her escape from the mundane life set out for her by her family. There were many that absolutely couldn’t bare to deal with the price for the things that their hearts yearned for and would let the opportunity slip through their fingers like sand. The girl wasn’t like that- in fact the reason she came here was to demonstrate that.

“I believe you. Had you not accepted the consequences, you surely wouldn’t have paid, thus being able to show up at my door.”

The god was known for his flair, and this time would be no different as he conjured a simple looking apple. But to those with demon heritages, they would be able to spot vile energies seeping from it. In Caitlin’s case, she would be able to as well because of her connection. “Perhaps. Perhaps not. Of what I wish for is of no concern at the moment. Right now, it is yours my dear. If you really want to get into the Academy then take the apple…and eat it. From there, I will explain my plan further to you. But you may know this- when you do consume it, you will be blessed for a lack of a better word with some of my power. But you will have a time period to get to the school and reach the headmaster. Until it runs out, they will not be able to find lies beneath your words."

He held the apple towards her in the palm of his hand, “But it might be better to be modest and not overdo it with your deceit. They may try and test you on whatever you speak to them in the future. The Academy is known for being relentless in that fashion.”

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Thu Nov 9, 2017 10:14 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

It wasn't hard to tell that she had given the demon lord something to think about, and Caitlin was proud of that.  It was clear he had been around for quite some time, and Xunatar must have seen a great many things.  But her simple statement had still given him pause for thought.  But he in turn gave her something to think about.  "Small villages like mine, I think there is too much work to be done to even really consider a revolt of any kind.  You have one or two powerful people at the top, like the man who was to be my father-in-law, and they make sure everyone is cared for just well enough, but there's still just enough to do that everyone is too occupied.  I was different… my father was a merchant, and he traveled.  He told me about the world beyond the village, and that doesn't happen very often," she explained, it was the best way to get the thoughts out of her head and sorted out.

Her face dropped a little when he mentioned a price, there was one that she had already paid.  Caitlin knew she could never return home, never see her brother and mother again.  And there was blood on her hands, but she had accepted those prices so far.  "I know.  And I've already paid.  At least part of the price," she said with a crooked smile.  Caitlin knew it was likely there were still prices yet to be found, but she would face that when when the time came.  But her face brightened again when he approved of her thoughts, and she decided there that would be her philosophy in the future.  It had carried her far, and she had a feeling it would be a good one to continue.

And she knew the Academy would be difficult for her to get into, but she was determined.  When Xunatar said he had a thought as to something that would help them both, Caitlin was more than willing to listen.  "Tell me, please!  I have the feeling what you want to do will take some people who deserve it down a few notches, given your reputation," she said, her smile turning slightly malicious.  It was only natural, she had been at the bottom of the pile for too long, and wanted to bring some down from their lofty posts.

Author: Xunatar, Posted: Fri Oct 27, 2017 8:41 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

He gave her words some thought, careful thought actually as he pondered. She was correct, that many didn’t feel like the cycle could change and just fell into line. There were many that regretted that decision after years after wasted years in servitude and poverty as they thought in their deathbeds. Caitlin’s refusal to fall into that cycle was as plain as day written on her face. “Yes, I do understand that many do not believe that change is possible. But it is only beaten into them by the very rulers that wish to keep them beneath their heel. What do rulers feat the most? The lost of control, or what they perceive as control anyway. When the people revolt and stand together, kings and gods alike react the way they do because they know that the danger lies in numbers.”

Smirking, he could see that she was much more than a woman that would see her life as just a doting wife and mother. No, she wanted to go places and do things and not feel stuck in that lowly village. “Of course, one thing to remember is that freedom does have a price.” And it could occur in any shape or fashion for her. Even he couldn’t see what payment it would cost her in the end, not that he would reveal that bit of truth.

“Ah, bright thinking, my child. The past is in the past. There is naught any of us can do about it, but to move forward.” She had a growing mind, easy to mold if given the right circumstances and the more she revealed her wants and desires, the more he could harmlessly dangle them all over her head. He was cruel to be kind, but could at time also be cruel for the sake of it. For the time being, neither method would be done. No, this was more of a delicate matter. “The Airship bit is quite easy for you, Caitlin. That academy though…” Xunatar tapped lightly on his chin a few times, softly and slowly. He was crafting something in that mind of his and when the idea came to him, the White Kitsune smiled widely.

“Perhaps there is a way we can both benefit from you venturing there. If you are willing to here my proposal, then I can guarantee that you will be able to go there, without any question from peers and teachers alike.”

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Tue Oct 24, 2017 11:19 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

While it seemed like his anger had faded, Caitlin knew better than to entirely let her guard down.  But she had to admit that Xunatar's observation was very true, and it made her realize something.  It was what had rankled at her for so long within the village, and perhaps she had been destined to leave that obnoxious little village behind.  "Things seem to only change in stories and fairy tales, and I definitely do not live in one of those.  So I guess I had to take control of my story for myself," she said, sounding thoughtful.  Her attention snapped back to the demon when he spoke of the current nobles and their positions, and he was quite correct from what she had seen.  "The man I was to be married to was like that… and he could only claim his position because of his father.  He was lazy, stupid and worthless.  It was the last straw for me to run away," Caitlin said, realization washing through her mind.  So many people viewed themselves as trapped within a cycle their fathers and forefathers had set up, and didn't have the will to do anything about it.

Her widened a little as Xunatar told her just a bit of his past, she had heard of crossroads demons but had never met one, of course.  They had just been used in children's tales to frighten the ones who wouldn't sleep.   "So keep the experiences of the past in mind, but forge your own future?  It seems like a good idea to me to learn from past mistakes, but not cling to them," she reasoned out, pacing back and forth for a few moments.  The idea of a few goals for her life was a good place to begin, and she had a few idea of just where she wanted to start.  "I've always wanted to learn more about the world and my talents, but my abilities to do that have always been limited.  Just because I was a mere girl from an insignificant village.  I know where I want to start, the Mage College in Iria.  And I want to take the Airship there.  I've just learned how to make portals, but there's something very fascinating to me about being able to fly through the air.  It's a small start, but there are a pair of goals for you," Caitlin chuckled.  For one as worldly as he was, her goals would likely be utterly mundane to Xunatar.  But to her, it was just the first few steps down a new path.

Author: Xunatar, Posted: Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:29 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

Xunatar sighed melodramatically and whatever anger that had been exposed had long since washed away. “And that right there is something that has always interested me about man. You lot believe that your fates are locked and sealed from the moment you are born.” While he would have followed it with a snicker to two, he refrained since this seemed like a rather sensitive issue for her and conjured himself a glass of white wine. “You all play the part you are born into- a prince will always be a prince, a pauper will always be a pauper. Nothing can ever change it and nothing ever changes. Fortunately, we demons don’t believe in such futile ideals and use our strengths and cunning to get to where we want, or die trying. Depends which happens first.”

He swirled his drink around during the last statement. They were entertaining if not annoying because of such a trait that was beaten down onto them for eons. Complacency left a nasty taste in his mouth, unlike the wine.  “But it wasn’t like that always for man- at the beginning, those that had the guile to lead, led. Those that could bare that burden did and became gods among the rest of them. Kings, rulers, leaders… However, the problem that came with their descendants; they didn’t have to do anything to prove their worth. All it took was for a legitimate birth and boom, they were next in line to lead. To hell with whether they were capable or not. All that mattered was that they had to possess royal blood. Look at the current and recently previous leaders- only a few have impressed me when they took back control of their respective territories. The rest grow fat like housecats and if they were forced into conflict, how many of them would fight and not snivel like babies?”

He sipped at his wine and stared her down, though his expression wasn’t a hostile one. Xunatar held nothing against Caitlin- she had a rough life, for a human. “No, I can’t imagine, but I never foresaw myself in this position years ago. Back home, I was a crossroads demon and yet I climbed up the ranks in any fashion, including enduring torture the likes most of you will never see. I broke through the chains, and so have you now, Caitlin. Whatever you had in the past, is in the past.” Finishing the last of the contents, he refilled the glass to the brim this time. He thought for a few moments, clicking the side of his glass with a black fingernail. She was at least willing to entertain his words, unlike the unfortunate that hadn’t. But then again, she was much younger in comparison, and he could work with the youth a lot better when they complied. “Have a goal or several. Now that you are free, you need to survive, right? What do you plan on doing for that? What do you wish to achieve or gain? One must think about what they want, and take it. You’re a bright young woman, and you should use every advantage you have to obtain them.”

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Wed Oct 4, 2017 11:24 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

His seeming refusal of her thanks surprised Caitlin, though she did her best to hide it.  She had always thought it in the best interest of a deity to have mortals that owed favors.  And she had thought it better to understand what she might owe, rather than have it surprise her at an unpleasant time.  But then he said one thing that set off her temper, something she'd had even before the demon had influenced her.  Her mouth ran away with her and when she finally ran out of words to say, Xunatar blinked and the room changed.  She was unable to hide the jerk of surprise at the change to his face, and Caitlin was only just able to hold herself very still.  She felt caught in the gaze of a predator, and realized she may have gone just a bit too far.  The change was a good reminder of just whose lair she had willingly stepped into.

Her head dipped in an apology when he was done speaking.  It was in those words that Caitlin realized she had a lot to learn, both about the world and of herself.  The words started spilling from her mouth again before she could really stop them.  But she felt more comfortable around Xunatar than anyone else she had in quite some time.  "You don't understand what it's like, I don't think.  To be confined, and fed stories of an outside world, then reminded you will never get to see it because you're being groomed to be a good wife to whomever my father decided was best.  I was never given freedom, I had never set foot outside of that village until less than a year ago, and I'm seventeen.  All my life in one place, being told there was so much more to the world, then being taught without words I would never see it," Caitlin said, her voice quieter, more thoughtful now.  It was the first time she had ever voiced those thoughts, and it was freeing to let them loose to a willing ear.

Taking a deep breath, she realized that he was right.  She needed to listen to someone who was more experienced, and she needed to learn.  And Xunatar seemed more than willing to impart with his knowledge.  "What advice would you give someone like me?  I know I'm naive, and untried in the world.  But I have my own head now, with no one but myself to tell me what to do.  What would you do, given where I came from, and where I am now?" Caitlin asked, swallowing her pride.  It was hard to ask, but there were many things that she did not know, and many more she wanted to learn.

Author: Xunatar, Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 5:49 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

Everything seemed to go so smoothly as their conversation deepened. He agreed that she should be in charge of her own fate, not passed down onto her by the will of someone else. Those that were strong enough to forge their own destinies would not fall into the fate of cattle, much like how most of the population did. They all only received one life, so it was best to make the most out of it. Of course, in the end, it wouldn’t matter all the same and he watched with amusement. “Your offering is unneeded- you assisted me after all… “ She had at least listened to his seldom advice and not fallen prey to her own pride, unlike the others before him.

And then, like a sudden storm, Caitlin had shifted her demeanor and was set off by something. The god first look to her with questions illumining from his eyes to a slight sting of annoyance. She was far too fueled by emotions as they came screaming out and pour from her body. For that moment, he had discarded his previous praises and was reminded of his son Colden and that hasty, ignorant woman, Cyprus. She clearly didn’t listen to his words and once she had her fill, all he did was blink. With that one single motion, it felt like all the air in the room became heavy and cold. Annoyance was written across his face as his eyes mirrored the room- cold and emotionless.

Arms were now folded as he stared at her, and his fingers started to drum lightly. “I need not care for what purpose you had back home, I spoke nothing of the sort. I suppose that I wasn’t clear, let me rectify that. I said that now that you are free and have the demon’s influence working in your favor, what will you seek?” Blinking again, the air returned around them. “If you have no goals in mind, then what’s the point of one’s life? We all have a role to play in this grand game. You elevated yourself as a player, yes? Then think more clearly and listen with ears open, girl. If you wish to see beyond the village, then do so. But don’t remain shackled by your past, there’s no point in dwelling in it.”

His attitude changed to a more serious but less frigid state. “I have given similar advice before, and many that I have done so don’t heed my word. You can imagine that they left it up to fate and needlessly to say, fate won. They…did not. Much like my son’s late mother- she was brash and single-minded. Reason was beyond her and in then end she was granted nothing but death twice. You? I like. So if I can get through to you, then it will not be in vain.”

He appeared right behind her and tapped at his head. “Potential, you have. You merely lack the knowledge of the world ahead of you, dear Caitlin.”  

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 4:28 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

Much as she hated to admit it, he had a point.  "That is true.  I've just spent far too much time waiting.  And all those times, my life was almost decided for me.  I had to take charge and do something so I was not passed by," Caitlin admitted.  The details of her story could wait, there were other things she needed to say first.  And in the overall scheme of things, they really were not all that important.  "Well, I did wish to thank you.  I would not have found my way as I did without your aid.  And it is quite likely I would have been consumed by the entity held in the gems.  You gave me the warning I needed, and I was ready.  So I truly do have you to thank," she said simply.  Caitlin knew it was a calculated risk.  She owed him quite a bit, but he did not owe her.  However, Caitlin hated the idea of being in debt to anyone.

But it was one word that caused a shift in her entire demeanor.  Her hands curled into fists at the mention of 'purpose' and her eyes flashed red.  "Purpose?  Why in the gods' green earth would I want a purpose?  Do you have any idea what purpose is, where I am from?  It meant being sold off to whatever man my father felt was the best deal for him.  It meant being a broodmare to a cruel man who wants a bunch of squalling brats.  It meant being shackled to a small village for the rest of my days and never getting to see the wider world.  Not having a purpose gives me a chance to find my true potential, and not what others think I should be doing," Caitlin spat out, her voice heated with anger.  She had escaped from her village just after being betrothed to a man she loathed, and had absolutely no intention of going back to such a life.

Author: Xunatar, Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2017 10:30 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

“Yes…and no.” Xunatar spoke whimsically, his voice still filling the air around her. “There is a time and place for both of those method, my dear lady.” After all the god was able to muster up whatever was necessary for him to achieve his goals. Caitlin was smart, he knew that she was one that would do anything it would take as well. If there was any sort of question to that, then the answer came with her new appearance. “Now, now, I am a creature that appreciate the delicate details, even the smallest ones. But we can discuss that later.”

Xunatar recalled their night on the town back in Kurayo and he didn’t bother to hide a smile. The foolish drow had paid for underestimating them, as well as using very weak tactics to try and kill them over the jewelry Caitlin had. There was no more business he had back there, but even if there was, it would be simple for the god of deceit to hide among a crowd of rejects and outcasts. But there was no desire to set foot there again on his part. “Is that all? You came all this way for a thanks?” His eyes gleamed at her, observing like that of a viper at its prey. Mayhaps she was here just to acknowledge him for his help to further her evolution, but things were never quite that simple. Not in the line of business he was used to.

“The Cradle serves to challenge those that seek to reach me. I am not one to give my time freely to just anyone. Like you, there had been those that succeeded and gained my audience, and then there’s the others. Plenty of them that never made the trek and have either given up or perish. They weren’t worth my time, but you, you are worthy. You kept me quite entertained back then, and from the looks of it…you will do so as well now. So, have you find a purpose now that you have made the change?”

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Sat Sep 9, 2017 5:20 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

Her old self would have frozen at the voice surrounding her, but Caitlin knew the voice to be that of a friend now.  "Better to learn quickly and adapt, than to stay in the shadows and be passed by," she replied with a grin.  There had been a time when she would have preferred to just sit and wait, decided what to do.  But that would have gotten her consumed from the inside out, and she was not about to take that risk again.  When he emerged, she offered him a respectful bow.  It was only right, given his ascension.  And Caitlin knew it was not a good idea to anger any of the gods, even if one was on friendly terms with them.  "It has, and there is a bit of a long tale behind that.  But I won't bore you with the details," Caitlin said.  She would only tell him the longer version if he asked. 

"No, and the warning you gave me was quite helpful.  It gave me the edge that I needed, and I wanted to thank you for it.  So here I am.  You did leave quite an impact, both on myself and Kurayo," she said with a chuckle.  The drow enclave had been burned to the ground, and there had only been one or two survivors.  They hadn't exactly been subtle about their actions, and Caitlin had a feeling neither of them were the most welcome back in that city.  "You've been busy as well, I quite like what you've built here.  I take it that people didn't quite get what they wanted?  I heard a few screams on my way here.  People really do need to be careful about what they ask for," Caitlin added, a rueful smile on her face.  It was something she knew quite well, and perhaps she had been in over her head at first.  But now?  She was content.  It was just a path she hadn't quite expected to take.

Author: Xunatar, Posted: Sun Sep 3, 2017 11:28 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

“My, someone learned very quickly in such a short time… “ The voice seemed to resonate from everywhere around the room, yet he still couldn’t be seen. “You are much more different from back in Kurayo, Caitlin… “ The god’s tone was filled with amusement as he watched her. She had embraced the demon it seemed and he had to say, it suited her very well. It wasn't just her physical appearance, no it was her demeanor as well. It was much more darker than she had been in their last encounter. 

When he grew tired of the game, a man garbed in a hooded robe of white with black stripes materialized from right behind her. His blue eyes shined from the darkness of the hood and lingered upon her before passing right by and made his way towards his throne. Xunatar didn’t take his seat though; instead he came around behind it and leaned against it. He threw his head back so that the hood would fall and reveal himself fully to her. “Your venture with the demon has indeed changed you, inside and out from what I sense every since you set foot here.” She was indeed helpful in his venture against the drow, though that sort of war wouldn’t cease. No, the debt they owed him was far from paid yet.

But this wasn’t about them right now- it was about his new visitor. A whimsical smile fell across his face as he felt the malevolence in her festering. “You decided to play the devil’s game. Fortunately you haven’t been overtaken by it, it seems.” He recalled that he had given her fair warning about seeking out the pieces that it wanted her to. Their kind were always up to some sort of shenanigans. And here they were now, and the game would reset a new. “Tell me, friend- why have you sought out little old me? I’m amazed that you would still remember me from a while ago.” 

Author: Caitlin, Posted: Sun Sep 3, 2017 3:37 PM, Post Subject: No Regrets [p:r]

Stepping through the crimson portal, Caitlin was not wholly certain as to what she would find.  But she did know that one person who understood what lay at her heart would be within this realm.  And he had helped her in the past.  She had even enjoyed his company.  The woman smiled a little at the thought, the girl who had left the village many long months ago would be horrified at the woman that stood staring across a dead forest now.  Her slim form had filled out and matured since she had last seen the demon, and the horns that now graced her head showed the reason.  She had melded with the demon contained in the bracelet she still wore, but Caitlin had overcome the Khal's desire to overwhelm her.  She smirked a little at the memory as she walked through the desolate forest that gave way to black sands. 

There were creatures in the distance that stank of rotten fish, and Caitlin walked away from them.  But the padding sound of scales hitting sand warned her, and without a thought, a fireball erupted from her hand and slammed into the tentacled creatures.  One disintegrated right away, and the other three were left ablaze.  She turned and continued her walk, certain they would leave her alone now.  She blinked, and found herself in a lovely courtyard now.  Caitlin followed the stone laid path, admiring the statues locked in battle.  The details were fascinating to her, and Caitlin had to pull herself away.  There would most likely be time to look later, and she wanted to meet again with Xunatar.

The golden doors were inviting, and she only glanced over her shoulder when they closed behind her.  She wanted to be here, and the twisting halls and changing stairways did not bother her.  There was a great deal of beauty to be found here, but there were screams that also echoed through the halls.  It was a warning to those who were unwary, or unwilling to realize just where they now stepped.  It felt like an hour of walking, but finally Caitlin found herself before a new pair of doors.  Her hand traced the four tailed fox, she found the sigil beautiful as well.  But she also knew the legend behind the creatures, and smiled.  It was quite fitting.  She decided to try the central set of doors, wondering if the straightforward path would lead her where she wanted this time after all the twists and turns.

And she was rewarded with the sight of a throne, though it was empty.  Patience now would be what guided her, and she sauntered through the hall, examining the stained glass windows.  It depicted a scene of belladonna flowers, lovely and deadly.  A chuckle escaped her throat, and she spoke her thoughts aloud, having a feeling Xunatar would hear her.  "Funny, I would never have seen this lovely place had I not deceived everyone where I was raised.  And I don't regret any of it, any of what I've done.  Does that make me a monster?  I don't know, and I'm not certain I really care," she said.  Caitlin had become a hedonistic creature, seeking new pleasures and experiences, things she never would have seen or known staying in a small Highlands village.